Body language experts, have a field day analysing this!
Every grown-up kid’s worst nightmare: A Dad like Jackie Chan?
Actually, scrap that. The worst nightmare of every grown-up kid who’s ever “done time”: A Dad like Jackie Chan – because you can bet your last dollar he won’t be there to bear-hug you when you stumble out of your cell.
Yup, talk about puritanical parenting. Papa Chan (and Mama, for that matter) have confirmed that they won’t be present when Jaycee’s released from jail next week – that means no slow-mo sprinting, no reconciliatory tears and dribbling snot, just a terse chauffeur twiddling his thumbs next to a black limo (or at least that’s how the scene is playing out in my mind!)
Maudlin fantasy aside, you know what’s the real kicker? If respectable Hong Kong broadsheet Ming Pao Daily News is to be believed, Jackie Chan doesn’t even know when his son would be released. Talk about an “ouch, that hurts” situation.
When pressed for the reason behind his obliviousness, Jackie told Ming Pao that – believe it or not – he “didn’t ask” for further info on Jaycee’s sentence, and that he “left it all to the lawyer.”
But wait, there’s more. Here’s Daddy’s stinging parting salvo: “He's a big boy. He should take care of himself. Don't live under my shadow.”
Oh, and for those who need further proof that Jackie is the very definition of a dragon Dad, the action superstar also compares his son’s stint behind bars to uh, tertiary education: “In the past, I saw him once in two years. But this time, I can rest assured. It's like he's gone to university.”
Still, it’s not all sticks and no carrot: Jackie Chan says Jaycee’s Mum Lin Feng-jiao has procured a posh new pad in Taipei last year to prep herself for her prodigal son’s reentry into society. Apple Daily also reports that Mdm Lin is hoping that newly “clean” Jaycee will stay in Taiwan with her, far, far away from the dodgy underbelly of Beijing’s hard-partying scene.
And if Papa is as emotionally aloof as his son alleges, Feng-jiao’s (somewhat melodramatic) ardour ought to make up for things; Jackie says his spouse has been beating herself up over Jaycee’s very public fall from grace: “She doesn't meet people, doesn't answer the phone and says she wants to be punished with her son.” Aww, come now.
If Jaycee’s reading this, keep your chin up, buddy. Your Dad, gruff and grumpy as he may be, does appear to genuinely care for you. Keep this in mind: “I won't say anything on [Jaycee’s] behalf, but I will back him up with his mother. I believe that our son will show us a new Jaycee and that a good thing will come out of a bad thing.”
Ah, well. Sending you good vibes, Jaycee, see you out and about soon!